September 11, 2016

My Safe Haven

Nothing beats the feeling of the running water of the shower on your shoulders at the end of the day. 

There I was, feeling the strong rush of water tapping every nerve end. With each tap, underlying feelings sneak up. Feelings I have been suppressing. Like a pot of tea on the stove, it slowly gets warmer and warmer, until it is too late and the process of heating the tea is unstoppable. The tea starts to bubble up. 

Under the shower, I stand tall at first. Shoulders stiff. Face serious. It is like meeting your love after a fight. You try to be strong and apathetic. Then as soon as he says the first word and you hear his voice, your muscles loosen up, and your anger starts to melt down. 

In the shower, I can act however I want to act. There is no one to see my weakness, no one to hear my sobs. Even I cannot feel the warmth of my tears running down. 

When I feel like the ground underneath me is crumbling and volcanoes are about to explode, the shower is my safe haven. I stay there for as long as needed. I only get out when the crisis has ended. 

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